So I just want to say that I'm really sorry for what I wrote about Bill O'Reilly yesterday and I feel really bad about it.I was out drinking the night before with my good buddy Alex Jones and my hangover felt worse than that time in my super-smash-hit box office movie Terminator 2: Judgement Day when the T-1000 was bashing me against the wall with that giant machine and that other time in my super-smash-hit box office movie True Lies when Jamie Lee Curtis hit me in the face with a telephone EEYYAAARGHH™!!!!
And when I woke up the phone was ringing and it was my good buddy George Lucas and he asked me if I wanted to be the comedy sidekick in the new Star Wars movie that he's making, Episode VII, so I slammed the phone down in disgust EEEYYYAARRGGGHHH™!!!!!
And then Maria slapped me in the face for being a Republican EEEYYAAARRRRGGGHH™!!!!
Bill, I was having a really bad day yesterday, and I'm sorry for what I wrote.
You're doing a terrific job for us, and I won't forget the hard work that you've put in over the years when I am elected President of the Universe in 2012 (start counting down).
And any time you want to come around to wash my Humvee or cut the grass, you're more than welcome.
